Trash Talk Tuesday: Review of Susan Straight’s Between Heaven and Here

“It’s a thin line between heaven and here.”

-Bubbles, The Wire

It may be because I took a class with Susan Straight, or maybe she writes differently than I typically read, but I expected more out of this book. She is the second professor I’ve had a class with that I actually read the book for. One professor required it, and that was okay because his book was gorgeous and I cried reading it. Though I think the man is cocky for making his classes read it. But Susan, I expected more out of you. 

I believe my main source of complaint comes from there being too many characters. I couldn’t keep track of who was who, and who was related to who, and who saw what and when. This made all the point of view shifts difficult for me, and I generally love changes in narration. Almost all of my writing has at least two narrators. 

My main source of awe was the words. Straight is a hilarious woman, gifted in the craft of fiction (that was the title of the course!). There were moments that were clear and beautiful. I enjoyed the read. But would I recommend? Not to most people. 

I love characters and plot. This book had both, but I wasn’t connected to any of it. The plot mattered but I felt that we, the readers, knew more than we should too soon. 

The best part of the book, and the time that I felt most connected with the plot and characters was the last two sections/chapters. They were what I expected when she mentioned the book in her class. A boy who finds out his druggy mother is dead before his last chance to take the SATs; his last chance to get out of his shitty life and the shitty town. The opening and the middle weren’t about this, but some were, of course. But the book was mostly about a town and how this woman’s death shows the connection between all the people. Which sounds great, right?

But then my stupid ass brain couldn’t remember character names and even if some characters were a male or female. And in a book that has prostitutes, rape, and family, the genders matter a little. 

I plan to read other reviews of the book. The “about” section of the book states that some of the sections/chapters were originally short stories. Honestly, I’m sure they were better stand alone. 2 out of 5. 

If you read this Professor Straight, don’t hate me! I loved your class!

Writing Wednesday: Poetry as Therapy

My grandmother passed away recently. She was the only one of my grandparents I ever knew. So though her death was expected because she was 87 and had dementia, it still hit me pretty hard. Harder than I expected.

I woke up in the morning with a voicemail from my mom saying, "Call me..." in a clearly upset voice. And I knew. I called and spoke with my dad, who only had time to confirm my suspicions and hang up. I sat in bed in shock, and then realizing how upset I was pulled out my journal and wrote a poem.

For some reason, I just couldn't get the idea out of my head that she died while my boyfriend and I were making waffles in the middle of the night. We danced to Stevie Nicks' "Edge of Seventeen" and were just laughing. All why she passed away. So that's what the poem was about. But the poem ended up turning into a eulogy the more I edited it. And due to distraction, I didn't save each version. So then, when my boyfriend critiqued me on the poem/eulogy, I freaked out. I was so upset that it was bad.

At her funeral, I didn't read it like I originally planned. I couldn't it, the thing had turned to shit. But later, I realized why it fell away into pieces when I edited it.

I'm a fiction and non fiction writer who enjoys writing poetry occasionally. But my poetry is always about personal, meaningful things to me. My poetry writing is therapeutic, its not the same was my fiction or even my non fiction. I almost can't edit it because I write it in a moment of deep emotion and thought. So maybe one day, I'll want to publish a book of my poetry but right now I'm saving my poetry for me. Because I'm only writing it for me. 

Writing Wednesday: Darkly Dreaming Dexter, a TV show better than the original book? MADNESS.

"Another beautiful Miami day.

 Mutilated corpses with a chance of afternoon showers."

- Darkly Dreaming Dexter, Jeff Lindsay

As any aspiring writer should, I try to always read the original book of a movie/TV adaption. The only book I refuse to do this for is Big Fish because I'm too scared of the possibly of not liking it. But everything else, I want to read the original, I want to support the author. 

So naturally, as a fan of the Dexter television series I needed to read the book. I finished it Tuesday afternoon, and it took me far too long to read a book that short. I had a hard time feeling compelled to read it since I knew the outcome, at least until the book took a weird turn that didn't occur in the first season of the show. Now that I'm done, I feel weird writing a review of this book because I've never truly and completely liked a TV/movie more than the original book. Live-action and even cartoon adaptions never do the author's words justice. But that's not the case with this book. 

I could tell he was a newbie writer. Things were repetitive. For example, Dexter had to keep telling us he was an unfeeling monster. And we got it after the first chapter. It didn't need to be spelled out for us, after he murders someone. The book also felt rushed, and not thought out until the end. It was as though, Jeff Lindsay knew the beginning and ending but didn't know how to connect the two. 

The best difference is Deb. Even LaGuerta. I'm glad they get more screen time in the series, but they are better characters in the book. Rita too! Oh my gosh, she's in the book so little I almost forgot about her. There's stuff about each of the women that I love in the show, but things I love just as much (if not more) in the book that they changed. One thing I realized during the last season of the show is that it's pseudo-feminist. They try to tell us the women are strong and independent but the women all rely on the men for just about everything. The men rely on no one, not even each other. Deb is like that in the book, but LaGuerta isn't. She's more sexualized in the book, but a slight bit more badass. 

Overall, I would give the book a 2.5. Feel free to voice your opinions in the comments!

Also, I'm excited for the new season even though some think it should have ended early. What do you think?

Writing Wednesday: Why I'll Never Get Published

"You think you’re all strong and silent, bro, 

but you’re a book with its spine cracked open

 and its pages falling free."

- Martin Amis, House of Meetings

For a few job interviews I've had recently, I've been asked about my long term goals and I've been telling them that I want to be published. And that is so sadly true, that my goal is to publish at least one book. Why is my goal not larger? Because I have come to realization that if I'm so afraid of even letting my friends and family read my work than how am I going to let an editor or publisher read it? 

I really need to get better about my confidence in my writing. But its hard when I know people who write so terribly and post their so-called poetry all the time. They post it on Tumblr with typos. How can I compete when my competitors are confident enough to post poetry on the internet that has TYPOS? 

So maybe I will never have the confidence in my writing to become a published author, but at least I won't post poetry with a misspelled title?

To anyone who reads this blog, how do you find the confidence to do the things you love?

Mad Monday: Finally Caught up on Mad Men

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I love Sally Draper. In many ways, Sally is the most likeable character on the show. This point was proven to me by catching up on the beginning of this current season. And after doing so, I have several questions for the writers.

1. What are you doing to Joan? She is better than this.
2. Does Don only marry women that are annoying enough to give him an excuse to cheat on them?
3. Why is Ted such a creep and why doesn't Peggy get creeped out by him?
4. Is there a reason Linda Cardellini needs to look like Betty Boop?
5. How is it possible that Pete's wife is only being a badass now?
6. Why is Harry Crane being such a dick?
7. Can Sally be on the show more often?

Putting my judgements of the show in question form makes me like less of a sneetch. Judgements aside, I'm quite curious and excited about the direction the show is taking.

Writing Wednesday: Writing feminist children's books

To get news from a source other than Facebook, I often look at the website for Bitch Magazine. After reading these two articles: How do you find feminist children's books? and "Mad Men" actresses reluctant to call Peggy and Joan "feminists" I have this to say: we need to stop allowing feminism to be a bad word.

I'm sorry but from my view of feminism Peggy and Joan ARE feminist. And what the hell is wrong with that? The association that this means they hate men, and they don't shave their legs? That's not feminism exactly. I find feminism to be about equality, and Peggy and Joan prove and fight to be seen as equal in the workplace and in the home. I don't think feminists hate women who want to be mothers either. It is about the choice to do so, rather than an obligation.

As a writer, I want to combat this problem by writing for younger audiences with a feminist intent. My hope is to write YA novels, and children's book that are about being yourself and having the choice to live life the way you want. Not the way society tells you are supposed to live your life.

Interestingly enough, a short story I wrote for children has a main character named Peggy. I started writing it before I new anything about Mad Men other than it being a show about the 1960s.

Now my question to the blog world:
What do you believe 'feminist' means?
Have you read any books for children you find to be 'feminist'?

Moody Monday: Jury Duty makes me grumpy

“You could have just propped me up 

on the table like a mannequin or a cardboard stand up 

and paint me any face that you wanted me to be seen with” 

- Ben Folds and Regina Spektor: You don't know me 

Well, I have jury duty. I can't tell you anything about it other than I hate most of humanity. Can you tell that I'm grumpy about being picked? I'm behind in TV and in my blogging plan. But that's okay? I'm doing my civic duty or some shit. 

If anyone cares here is an interesting article about bras and tits: Are you ready to unleash your ta-tas? And here is my friend's Kate blog entry about last week's episode of The Good Wife: The Good Wife is actually a comedy. 

TV shows I watch airing this week: 

Sunday: The Good Wife

Monday: How I Met Your Mother

Tuesday: none.

Wednesday: none

Thursday: The Vampire Diaries  

Feminist Friday: Sally Draper is my hero

"You have big ones. My mommy has big ones too. 

And I'm going to have big ones when I grow up."

-Sally Draper, Mad Men Season 2

I haven't started the new season of Mad Men so no spoilers, please!

If anyone asks, (and no one does) I would say Sally Draper is my favorite character. I feel a personal kinship with her because she reminds me of myself, and Betty reminds me of my mom. The relationship between Betty and Sally is too similar to mine with my mother. It almost creeps me out.

From my understanding, (I only started watching Mad Men recently) this show isn't seen as being completely feminist. My boyfriend thought I wouldn't like it because of the comments that are made and the way the women are treated. He pretty much said that only Peggy Olson is seen as feminist on the show. I find this to be completely wrong. For the most part, all the women stand up for themselves, they treat each other with respect, and they do what they can with what they have. I recommend this show to women who want feminism to be about respect and equality, but not to women who think of feminists as being women who hate men.

My love of Sally, and my decision that she is ultimately my hero came from the ending of Season 5. Sally tries to go on a date, but gets her period for the first time so she ends up running home. The look on her face made me want to cry and laugh at the same time. I was so worried about her. I loved that she just went home. Betty proved me wrong for a moment, she held her daughter and spoke to her about her period like Sally was an adult. She didn't shame Sally, or make Sally feel embarassed about it (and that's more than my own mother can say about my first period). In that moment of Betty consoling Sally about her fear and worry about becoming a woman I saw Betty as a good mother. But then Betty turned it around to prove that she is a good mother to Megan, with whom Betty is having a one-sided competition.

Sally became a woman, and the writers of Mad Men told us in a way that I found inspirational as a writer and as a woman.

Writing Wednesday: The obligation to write non-white characters

 “In this country American means white. Everybody else has to hyphenate.” 

-Toni Morrison

This is a touchy subject, but one that has been brought up a lot throughout my writing classes, and even in conversations with friends. I was reminded of this subject, once again, after reading the article: Young Adult Books Too Often Present a World Without People of Color from Bitch Magazine the other day. I agree completely that we too often have to read books about white characters without any mention of people of color, and that if there are characters of color they are read as white rather than as the ethnicity the author intended. Anyone else remember the racist posts on Twitter about The Hunger Games film? Oh, how I wish those were some terrible joke.

Is the problem with the writer? Or is the problem with what is published? Or is the problem the readers? I find the problem to be all three.

What is a white author's obligation to write non-white characters? Having spoken to several professors about it, the obligation seem to come simply from being a writer. You don't only write about your boring life. You write about other experiences, other worlds, other timelines. Why not write about someone who doesn't look like you? The moment this idea really hit home for me was when a professor asked, "You don't worry about a man telling you don't understand the experience of the male you are writing, do you?"

As a writer, I find the problem to be choosing the right words.There is no way to please everyone, but in matters of race and ethnicity I feel as though there is no winning with anyone. Either I blatantly describe my character as Hispanic and someone tells that I know nothing about the experience of a Hispanic person, so I'm a bad writer. Or, I subtly have my character speak Spanish or have a Hispanic name and someone still reads the character as white, so I'm a bad writer. This problem usually causes me to stick with names I deem to be "American" and let people imagine them as anything. But we live in a culture that has raised us to read all characters as white unless told otherwise. We need to rectify that problem.

In the end, no one has an "obligation" to write characters into their novels that aren't white. But do you really know no one of another ethnicity? Are you too scared to write about "them"? My biggest question to the people who publish books that are only about white people is WHY? There are plenty of writers in the world who are better writers with better ideas who aren't afraid. Go find some better writers and publish them. The world will thank you for it.

Recommended reading:
The Bluest Eye by Toni Morrison

"Most men, they'll tell you a story straight through. 

It won't be complicated, but it won't be interesting either."

- Big Fish, screenplay by John August

 I've tried to write blogs before and for some reason I always end up losing interest. This blog may not be able to keep my interest, but I'm starting it because starting over is probably better than continuing a blog I already lost interest in. 

Keep reading this blog if you are interested in hearing my opinions/reviews about the television shows I watch. Those are The Good Wife, How I Met Your Mother, Pretty Little Liars, Modern Family, The Vampire Diaries, Grey's Anatomy, Mad Men, Breaking Bad, and Parenthood. There are more but those are the ones that currently come to mind. 

My blog will also include my struggles, successes, and thoughts on writing. I will be reviewing books I read, movies I see, and new TV shows I try to start. Most of my work includes a feminist opinion, and those will be shared on this blog as well. 

The rating system I have established for myself is as follows: 

1. The lowest score. These are books/TV/ movies I have a hard time finishing because I find something about the writing, or acting unbearable. An example of a book with the score of 1 would be Twilight by Stephanie Meyer.

2. A score of a 2 means the book was readable, but I didn't care. The book either made me feel annoyance or nothing at all. Example: Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson. 

3. Maybe the book I deem a 3 isn't that well written on an English class scale but something made me love it. Example: Looking for Alaska by John Green. 

4. English class level writing but still enjoyable to any reader. A 4 should be something I gush over without any hesitation to someone who is judgmental about author choices. Example: Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer.

5. Books I call a 5 should be amazing. Maybe people don't like these books but it's not without millions who love them and the chance for them to be remembered forever. My example of a 5 is The Sun Also Rises by Ernest Hemingway. 

I will officially start this blog on Monday, with a rundown of the TV shows I watched the week prior. Have a good weekend everyone!

Just finished reading: The Silver Linings Playbook by Matthew Quick 
Currently reading: Watchmen and Philosophy: A Rorschach Test edited by Mark D. White
and Watchmen by Alan Moore